The guest list was small considering eight kids from SD's class were coming so including the birthday girl and her little sister MG, there would only be ten kids. Yeah but hop those kids up on cookie cake and it seems like there are a lot more running around and screaming their heads off. (The cookie cake was the true highlight of the party for me and the other adults. Sidenote: This is the second year in a row I have picked up the cake for my sister. Both years as I am waiting in line, I seriously have to fight the urge to buy a "Double Doozie". They look amazing. One day, one day. You know, when I have 13,000 calories to spare.) But seriously, is this what I was like in the first grade? Did I repeat the same joke as the funny kid twenty-five times along with everyone else (Example: My brother-in-law, BR, arrived at the pool after the kids had. SD and MG, excited to see their father, ran up to hug him saying "Hi Daddy!" and then the one class clown.. oh yes they have already fallen into these stereotypes in the 1st grade... ran up and did it too. This caused the seven other kids to start yelling, and I mean yelling "hi daddy" to each other for five minutes and hysterically laughing. Do I get why it's funny? No. Is it cause I'm not six years old? Probably)? Did I make gross noises along with the rest of the class? Did I smear icing on the other kids' faces in front of 10 adults? I just don't think I did. I was a well-behaved kid in the realm of school and parties and stuff like that. But who knows? Maybe mob mentality kicks in and you just start going crazy. But if I did act like this back in the day, I sincerely apologize to Mrs. Moore and all of my other elementary school teachers.
And it's not like I don't like little kids. I always have. I use to beg my sister to let me go with her on baby-sitting jobs when I was younger. I worked at a camp for three summers with kids ranging in age from 6 weeks to 10 years old. I have nieces. I like little kids. Well maybe I should rephrase that to "I like well-behaved little kids". My nieces are well-behaved. They don't cause scenes in public places. But these kids-- goodness. I understand it's summer, a birthday party, and they are 6/7 years old. But come on! The pool part wasn't too terrible. Minus the fear of a child drowning on your watch (I did find it funny that the rest of the adult family members supervising were extremely focused on which of the fifteen or so kids at the pool were in our group. Cause if you see a kid drowning but he isn't a part of the birthday party, you aren't going to jump in and save him? We shouldn't discriminate). They played some games like seeing who could jump the farthest and took turns pushing BR into the pool. Good times all around. Little did I know, this was the calm before the storm...
Then we walk the short distance back to my mom's house for lunch and cake and a game or two. My mom has a pretty well-stocked playroom upstairs for my nieces and the girls were told to go and change in there while the adults set up lunch (pizza and fruit salad) for the kids. So a couple of minutes later I noticed some of the little girls were missing from the table when lunch was being served. So I go upstairs and find the Mean Girls trio in-training playing with "The Littlest Pet Shop" and Disney Princess toys (Sidenote: I don't get the deal with Littlest Pet Shop. My nieces are obsessed. Maybe I would have been too at their age. But I don't get it. They are so freaking tiny! What's the point when you lose the things half the time?). I put on my excited aunt/camp counselor voice and told them that it was lunch time and they needed to come downstairs. So the girls started whining and complaining about how they wanted to stay and play. I then told them (nicely) it was time to eat and they could play afterwards. The girls tried to bring the toys downstairs and I told them to leave them upstairs because there was no point in making a big mess upstairs and downstairs. Then one little girl turned to me and gave me a look as she snidely explained, "That's the whole point of birthday parties. To make big messes". There may have even been a "duh" attached. But most certainly there was an exasperated sigh as she had to explain this to an obviously incompetent twenty-two year old. Well, excuse me for not knowing that was the whole point of birthday parties these days. I thought it was to see friends, eat cake, and play some games. But apparently, according to Little Miss Priss, times have changed since I was a kid. It took some (read: a lot of) effort to not quip "Well then I am sure you won't mind coming back upstairs with me later and helping me pick up all of the impossibly small toys you have strewn about the room in the five minutes you've been in here" and simply said they could come back and play after lunch. That didn't stop them from hiding a few choice princess dolls in the dress-up box to ensure that no one else would get a shot at playing with them. Oh and when it was decided by other adults that it would be best for the kids to play outside rather than upstairs (because the room would have been demolished in 38 seconds flat) Little Miss Priss was annoyed that I did not fulfill my promise of returning to the playroom. And she let me know it by trying to call me out like I could get in trouble or something. Kids today, sheesh.
So lunch and cake finally started. Honestly, I have no words. It was so loud and so chaotic, I had to walk away after a few minutes. The noises and the yelling: the completely typical behavior of 6/7 year olds I'm sure. I feel sorry for the teacher (saint?) that had to put up with this for an entire school year. That's another thing! These kids all go to a relatively small private Christian school in the atlanta area. Two of them were the Pastor's kids! And this is the behavior they exhibit? It was unbelievable. Oh and one boy had a punctured eardrum so he had to have wax in his ear in the pool. That's cool. What's not cool is the fact that he changed in our downstairs bathroom and then... oh I cringe as I write this... apparently pulled the wax thing out, rolled it up in a ball, and threw it on the floor near the mat in the living room where my three-month old niece was happily playing. I walked over thinking it was a ball, stooped to pick it up, realized what it was, and recoiled in fear as well as disgust. And while my siblings made fun of me for freaking out, none of them were willing to pick it up either. We had to call my mom in to handle it since she wouldn't be fazed and is a professional in all things gross after having five kids and seven granddaughters.
Then they played a version of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey where I did feel bad for the second kid that went because he got it close to the right spot and then all the other kids used his as a guide to get even closer the correct spot. But there were no prizes so no tears were shed. And then the best part of the whole ordeal-- the parents came! But man, some of those kids are sassy to their parents, so of course why would they be any better in the presence of absolute strangers? That's another thing: When I was little I can remember being in absolute awe of people older than me. I idolized the 6th grade safety patrols when I was a mere first grader. Anytime we had a special helper who seemed to be a high schooler or, gasp, a college student, I would try to be on my best impressive behavior around them. These kids couldn't have cared less. They also thought my 30 year-old sister was my mom so they might be bad at guessing ages. Not saying they should worship me or my siblings but maybe try to, you know, not act like a little hoodlum.
Now I know I shouldn't judge so much because I don't have kids of my own but I do have brothers and sisters that are raising well-behaved kids so I can use them for comparison. But attending a variety of parties for my nieces over the years, has made me realize that my child will be having one kid over for their birthday parties. I will also ask who is the quietest and shyest kid in their class and he/she will most certainly be the sole guest. And best case scenario (for me), the kid will be mute.
Disclaimer: The party was an overall success. The birthday girl had a wonderful time, the cake was delicious, the decorations were topnotch, and my sister MR sure does know how to throw an eventful and memorable party.
No comments:
Post a Comment