"Up on the rooftop/ Reindeer pause/ Out jumps good old Santa Claus"

I may have done something awful to my kids today. But I may also be absolutely brilliant.

Between the freezing weather and their specials (spanish, science, music) being cancelled, the kids and I are spending A LOT of time in our room. I understand that Christmas is coming and they are getting a little stir crazy and being in a 16x16 foot room is finally taking its toll. That being said they have been OUT OF CONTROL these past few days. I hit a desperate moment earlier today. And the following ensued:

One of the other teachers walked by the door carrying some jingle bells for a craft. All of my kids backs were turned so they didn't SEE who was the cause of the jingling. And I may have gasped and said "I just saw Santa peek into our room!" All of the kids may have gotten whiplash as they turned to see if he was still there. But unfortunately he wasn't. But then I took it a step further and said I saw him write down on a list the kids who were being nice and listening and sitting criss-cross applesauce and being good. He also wrote down the kids who were being naughty and flopping around on the floor and talking while the teacher was talking and not being on their best behavior. They could hear still the jingling down the hall. I definitely saw some doubt on the kids' faces but there was a glimmer of "What if she is telling the truth and he saw me being naughty?" Let's just say they were all sitting criss-cross applesauce from that point forward.

Brilliant or cruel? I'll let you decide. Then if you vote cruel, I will gladly let you come into my room and take the reins for a few hours and we'll see what tricks you have up your sleeve.

My only regret is not coming up with this in November. Have my assistant jingle some bells outside the door a couple times a week when things were getting rough. I'm a genius.

"I did it/ do you think I've gone too far/ I did it/ Guilty as charged"

I did it! I did it! Thirty days of blogging! DONE! I may have quit ballet, gymnastics, the violin, that one art class I took, majoring in advertising, and trying to run long (really any) distances but I did this!!! Didn't think I could but I did. This gives me new hope and confidence that I can post more often on here even when I'm exhausted from being surrounded by kids all day. So I'll try to post more regularly. Maybe twice a week. A tiny little thought in the back of my mind says try to do it every day for a year but I don't think I have enough to say. I know, hard to believe. But I promise to try to write more often. Thanks for being along for the ride. It was fun slash stress inducing when I realized my bedtime was drawing near and I hadn't written anything that day. Still. Fun times.

P I'm an idiot. It was a month on the 8th. Oh well. Two bonus posts on top for good luck. Or one step closer to the year long goal?! Nahhhh, just don't think I can. But we'll see.

"Baby you gotta know that I'm just out here/ ... I'm taking these chances"

I hate to say it, but the quality of The Office has declined in recent seasons. I don't know if they are just running out of ideas or steam or what but it just has not been the same. I've read people blame the union of Jim and Pam but I don't agree. I LOVED when they finally got together. But it's like the writers no longer knew what to do with them so they just made them unlikeable. Pam... I mean whatever. She was an idiot with the whole not choosing Jim for years thing. I could take her or leave her. But Jim! Jim! I love him. And sometimes I just cringe for what they are making John Krasinski do on the show. Who knows? His movie career is increasing so maybe he wants off. But most certainly Steve Carell does. Especially in tonight's episode (Classy Christmas) I noticed how much older he looks; so drained like he is over this whole deal and can't wait to get out the door.

I'm not saying I am giving up the show. I saw glimpses of the old goodness in tonight's episode. I just want Jim and Pam to likable again. And Andy to be hilarious (talk about an evolution! I hated that guy and now he might be my ultimate favorite). And why are they trying to make everyone hate Oscar all of the sudden? Just find your old stride, Office writers, please. Don't have a good thing go to waste.

PS If you didn't hear the Lil Wayne/Office theme song mash-up that was circulating a few months ago on the internet, you are missing out. Gold-den.

"Why do you do this to me/... Every time I wind up back at your door"

Sometimes I'm awkward. I don't deny it. Sometimes I don't know what to say. Or I say the wrong thing and beat myself up over it for hours afterwards. Or I feel the need to clarify myself which really just involves saying the same thing again and again until I am sure the person understands me.

But there are other ways to be awkward in life than saying stupid stuff. Like holding the door open. Don't you hate it when you pull open a door and you notice someone is behind you but they are just far enough away that you stand there dumbly like a doorman or doorstop until they get there and realize you didn't really need to stand there. Yesterday I had this happen with one of the moms (that I love) at work. She was just far enough away that I felt obligated to hold it open so it didn't smack in her face but then she had to rush cause she felt bad that I was holding it open and all of this freezing cold air was getting inside. We acknowledged that the situation was awkward. Which really just made it more awkward. Good thing she's awesome.

And this seems to happen all too frequently at work and Starbucks. Maybe that's cause those are the main two places I go. And other places like Target have automatic doors. But we all know I am awkward with those too. Sigh.

So yes. Sometimes I'm awkward. Like in this post.

And yes, my boss did have me as her secret santa. She got me a super cute purse that I may or may not have just stared at for five minutes cause I love it. Hint: I did.

"I will never stop until you're mine/ ... Don't you understand/ I'll never stop"

I thought of a good topic to blog about today on the drive home from work. Now I cannot remember. Curses.

This is my 100th post of 2010. Woop woop!

I baby-sat for my three nieces and nephew tonight. I changed the almost-two year old's diaper and was not expecting a poopy. So I exclaimed "AJ, what is that?!" and she simply said "Poop." hahahaha. I laughed so hard. Then she also said humidifier. She is only 21 months people! And my 4 month old nephew was a little grumpy so I was holding him and trying to get him to calm down. I started narrating his thoughts to my 8 and 7 year old nieces and they thought I was hilarious. MG told me I was so funny. Yes. The kids at work think I'm funny too. Clearly I appeal to those under 4 feet tall.

Tomorrow is my work Christmas party. I'm such a fancy adult. Going to work Christmas parties, bringing appetizers, and my secret Santa will be revealed. Even though I am about 99% sure, it's my boss. I don't know why I feel pressure because of this. It's not like I have to give her an awesome gift or I will be fired. I just have to have a good reaction. Fingers crossed.

And that's all. What a random post. But I am NOT giving up now. Go me!

PS That's two N Sync lyrics in recent days. Such a shame since the Backstreet Boys were always superior. Gotta get them in there. But what is with me and the early 2000s pop. Mandy Moore and N Sync. What is wrong with me?

"I come back to December all the time"

I always check the weather on my phone when I wake up in the morning so I know how to dress for the day. Much to my dismay, it said it "feels like fifteen degrees" when I woke up this morning. That should be illegal. Sidenote: I totally used to think that it was "windshield" and not "wind chill"; as in they used a thermometer on a windshield to see how cold the glass was. I'd like to say this was in elementary school but it went far beyond that. I'm dumb!

Anyway, you just always want what you can't have. I remember earlier this summer sitting on the playground in the blazing sun, trying to find the one square foot of shade and sweating while doing absolutely nothing, praying for it to cool off. Now it definitely has cooled off and I want nothing more than for it to be warmer. I'm sick of my eyes watering from the cold and my lips being chapped and having to wear four layers to work (winter coat, wool sweater, long sleeved shirt, and tank top) only to still be freezing. Unfortunately they still haven't turned the heat on at work so I am freezing inside too. I can just never win. But it makes me appreciate spring and fall that much more (you know, all two weeks that we get during the year in Georgia).

But now maybe it finally snow tomorrow and answer my kids' prayers/guesses every morning when we decorate Sam the Weather Panda. Funny enough, they always predicted it would snow "tomorrow" in September and October. But these days, where snow is actually a possibility, they just keep guessing cloudy. But one of the kids did say it was "blustery" the other day. Impressive.

"Would you be so into me/ If I wasn't a celebrity?"

I've read People magazine pretty much since I could read. Okay, most of the time I just looked at the pictures. But we've had a subscription forever and I always remember looking forward to the best dressed issue and the most beautiful people issue. But I have to say, I won't be sad if my mom doesn't renew the subscription this year.

It's funny how the magazine does flashbacks to 25 years ago and you see how cover stories were about stories that captured the nation like Baby Jessica or the Oklahoma City Bombing. They mattered. Extraordinary stories about ordinary people. Then it slowly evolved into being about the A-listers: Brad, George, Meg, Julia, etc. Then somewhere along the way it started to seep into the gossipy magazines genre. If I see the Kardashians, Kate Gosselin, The Real Housewives, Heidi Montag, Paris Hilton, pop stars like Britney and Jessica and Christina, or some other reality tv "star" on the cover, I am going to scream (along with the 14 weight-loss issues a year. I DON'T CARE). Stay on In Touch or Life&Style covers, buckos. But seriously? When did it credentials go down? I know it is still the magazine willing to shell out big bucks for the top stories and it seems like it is still the most "trustworthy" in its genre but my goodness, I am so over it. It takes me 10 minutes to flip through the entire issue because I just don't care.

I know, I know, why bother complaining about it when you can just ignore it but it just makes me wonder what forced the change? Is it just the internet and how everyone has a Facebook fan page and Twitter and blog so their writers can just pull from those sites for their stories. Although whoever wrote the cover story about Kate Gosselin fourteen stories ago right after the divorce was announced deserves a raise because it almost, almost, made me feel sorry for her. Almost.

But seriously, People doesn't have to go all deep and gritty on me. Just maybe toss some A-listers on the cover instead of D-listers, please.

"Who me?/ Yes, you/ Couldn't be/ Then who?"

When I was little, I LOVED the WeeSing videos. Sillyville, WeeSing Together, The Best Christmas Ever, and Old King Cole's Party (we actually lost that one or gave it away on accident; I'm still mad about it) and of course Grandpa's Magical Toys. My sister found a dvd of Grandpa's Magical Toys at a garage sale and got it for me for old times sake. Luckily I threw it in my bag one morning before work since it was raining and it was a saving grace when the kids didn't get to go out on the playground.

My mom warned me that she had put on one of the VHSs for my nieces a long time ago and they weren't interested. Let's face it, these movies were made in the late 80s/early 90s; the special effects are not up to par with this Pixar and DreamWorks generation. But I remember I how much I loved them and wanted to at least try it (and at the very least not have to watch The Letter Factory for the billionth time). They sing old school songs and nursery rhymes in this particular one and my kids LOVED it (well not one little girl who was freaked out by the clown Punchinello but she came around). They sing "Who Stole the Cookies from the Cookie Jar" and at the end the cookie jar talks in this deep, rumbly voice and says "No one stole the cookies from the cookie jar. You ate them all yesterday". This has been the number one quoted line. And now every day, at the end of the day, we sing the song. They are obsessed. The Pre-K kids were in my room and they wanted to learn the song. The kids in the other class wanted to learn the song. Basically I am now a hot commodity because they all want to learn in and since none of these kids are exposed to anything beyond Dora, Hannah Montana, Spiderman, and Toy Story (I actually pitched Grandpa's Magical Toys as a "like Toy Story but with real people!" This may have been what caused the little girl to freak out. And also all the kids to ask if Buzz and Woody were in it), they thought I was the sole person with insider knowledge.

I'm just saying, if you have a three or four year old, give WeeSing a chance. My siblings still block it out because apparently I made my mom play WeeSing in Sillyville every morning. Hey, Sillywhim was the shizz.

"A world that's fun of happiness that I have never known"

So... close... must.. keep... going.....

When I first started this blog, I decided to do song lyrics for every post. Most of the time they are related to the content, others it is just the song I have stuck in my head. I kind of always have a song stuck in my head. The one most frequently is "Don't Cry for Me Argentina" even though I only know like three lines. I use it on my family when I am sad and change the words to "Do cry". Now, imagine my glee (pun) when it was used on the most recent episode of Glee! Now I can learn all the words!

The same thing happened when the song "On My Own" from Les Mis was stuck in my head thanks again to Lea Michele. That one was stuck in head ALL day for, not exaggerating, three days.

Oh Broadway shows. Legally Blonde and Wicked also do this to me. As does Glee. Sigh.

"Ayo/ I'm tired of using technology"

I'm typing this on my brother-in- law's iPad. I can already say the full keyboard isn't that easy and contractions are about to get eliminated from this post. But still... I will probably be fighting the urge to purchase in a few months.

I am sort of a hypocrite. I will denounce something only to own it a few months later. When the iPhone first came out, I was so sick of the commercials ALL THE TIME. But sure enough, I got one three months after it came out.

I thought the same thing about UGG boots only to get a pair from my sister's friend when I was freezing and desperate for warmth. While I still think UGG boots are not attractive, they are comfortable. In the words of michael Ian black: it's like sticking your foot into a sheep's butt.

Also skinny jeans; why would anyone want that? Aren't jeans supposed to be comfy not constricting. Then I got a pair of boots I wanted to tuck my jeans into (another fad I initially scoffed at) and the bootcut just wasn't cutting it. Hence my purchasing of two pairs that I now long and perhaps wore with ballet flats today when I originally resolved to only wear them with the boots. Oops.

I'm sure there are million other examples but those are the three off the top of my head.

Okay the typing got bit easier. So we might be adding the ipad to the list.. Christmas is coming up. Wink wink.

"I am so ashamed of all these unopened doors/ I am so ashamed of what I have become"

I'll admit it: I scare pretty easily. Not just in the like "I don't do haunted houses or watch horror movies" way but the if I turn around and my co-worker is standing there, waiting to ask a question, I give a little start. I can't help it. I'm skittish.

My sister's family is staying with us until their house is ready. They also brought along their dog, Remy. Remy has added a whole new element of startling to my day. His little paws are so quiet. And I turned around and he's just there. I open my door in the morning to leave for work, it's practically pitch black and what do I see? A little furry brown and white face staring at me. Just now I walked out of a room and he was sitting on the couch. Every time I yelp and jump a little. Remy is a rather scaredy-cat himself so I am sure I am scaring him as well. I can't help it. I'm not used to it. He's just there. All the time. But I do love him since I haven't seen him for 2.5 years! Welcome home Rem-Rem!

"When you smile/ The whole world stops and stares for a while"

I'm blogging while babysitting. That's how determined I am to meet this thirty day goal especially since I am SO close to the end. Thanks sister MR for letting me use your laptop. And don't worry all the kids are in bed! I'm not slacking on the job.

Just a few work stories from the past few weeks:

There is a little girl in the other three's class who I had this summer so I still see her in the hallways. Her mom is several months pregnant so one afternoon I was talking to R and asked if they had picked any names for the baby. When she said no, I started suggesting some names like Flower and Rock, that sort of thing. Then I pretended to get really excited and said she should name the baby Annie! She could tell I was kidding and laughed and told me I was funny (score).

A few days later, she ran up to me in the morning and said "Ms Annie, guess what?! We're going to name the baby Annie". My heart soared with pride, my eyes filled with tears, my mouth dropped open in shock. I choke out, "Really?" barely above a whisper. Only to be told by a three year old, "No. I was just kidding" who then ran away laughing at how she had truly duped me. In my defense, she also tricked her two own teachers with the same joke.

So a few mornings later, her mom was dropping her off and I told the mom how good her daughter got me. And then the mom told me that the little girl had named her Build-a-Bear she had gotten that weekend Annie! Awwwwwww. That means more to me than the baby. :)

And the other cute story: I work all day and stay while the kids take their naps. The afternoon kids are a mixture of 3s and Pre-K. The day before Halloween weekend, the lady I work with and I were joking around with the kids telling them what candy to bring us on Monday after they went trick or treating. Low and behold, one of the 4s brought my co-worker all of his tootsie rolls cause they are her favorite on Monday. He asked me to remind him what my favorite was and that he would bring them to me tomorrow. Now my hopes had already been let down once so they weren't too high. They then deflated in the morning when I saw him walking towards my classroom apparently empty-handed*. Almost all hope was lost until he gave me a big smile and withdrew a plastic bag of several Reese's Peanut Butter Cups because he knew "buttercups" were my favorite. Well you can pretty much assume I almost started to cry right then and there. So sweet.

*It has nothing to do with taking candy from a baby/little kid. I just want to know that they like me, really like me. Even when he gave me the candy, I tried to convince him to take them back because they are delicious but he wouldn't have it. Awwww.

See, that's why you have kids (said in the voice of Phoebe Bouffay-- the episode where Ross's son goes to school with Sting's son. BAM.). Or at least teach them.

And every time I step up in the building/ Everybody's hands go up/ And they stay there!"

Not gonna lie, it's getting a little tough to blog for 30 days. Amazing since I thought "oooh that would make a good blog post" about fifty times when I wasn't writing on here consistently but now that I am... nothing. So this was almost going to be a post about how I have nothing to write about. But then in a flash of genius, I realized that it's Monday!! So that means *drum roll* Music Monday! I present to you five songs I can't get enough of:

1. White Blank Page -Mumford & Sons. The whole album is pretty fantastic. Aside from their single Little Lion Man, this is also my favorite. Oh the emotion, the anger, the rage. And therefore my love.

2. All I Do Is Win -DJ Khaled. While unfortunately this was not UGA's theme song this season (actually it is probably more Auburn's since Newton has "money on [his] mind/ [he] can't ever get enough" HEY-OH!), I still can't get enough. If a rap song is ever stuck in my head, it's a good chance it is this one.

3. Innocent -Taylor Swift. I love this song. It's just so purdy. And it's T-Swifty. Nothing more needs to be said.

4. Just the Way You Are -Glee Cast version. Like I could have a MM without the cast of Glee. Pfft. But I looooove this one. It was so adorable in the episode. Oh Furt.

5. Deck the Rooftop -Glee Cast. Okay I lied, I had them on here twice. But I'm not in as much of a music buying frenzy as I usually am. This is a mashup of Deck the Halls and Up on the Rooftop. Not gonna lie-- the first few listens I thought they were singing "Deck the hallsies up on the rooftop" but far too longer for me to admit I realized it was "Deck the halls/ He's up on the rooftop". Still, it's a toe-tapper.

"So you are now watching the Shaytard vlog/ Just sit back, relax, follow along/ To the things Shay says/ To the things he does/ With his cool family"

Another big factor as to why I didn't blog as much in past months was because I became obsessed video logs aka vlogs. Like people on YouTube who have recorded every day of their lives for the past year or even two years! I know, why would I care what ordinary people do on a day-to-day basis? But it's strangely fascinating. Even if at times even I acknowledge that I can't believe I am watching someone mow their lawn or take their dog on walk. But these people have huge followings on YouTube (well more likely, they had a sketch channel of some sort and then started an additional vlogging channel)! And these are my three favorites. I would say they are in order but I can't because I love all of them for different reasons. Here they are:

1. The Shaytards. No, not tard as in retard but as in unitard/leotard. I don't know why they picked the name, all I know is Shaytard (the dad), Mommytard, Sontard, Princesstard, Babytard, and Rocktard along with Malachitard (their dog) make up the most adorable family. I wish I was related to them. They make me want to travel to Idaho. They've been vlogging EVERY day for the past two years! The audience was there when they announced they were pregnant all the way to the delivery of Rocktard (not the actual, just afterwards). It's like I know them. The true moment I realized I was obsessed was when Mommytard bought two dresses for Princesstard and Babytard and held up each one say who it was for. I immediately thought Oh Babytard is going to like the one for Princesstard way more. And a split second later, the dad said the same thing! And sure enough, Babytard liked the other dress more! I felt so proud of myself. As well as a little worried. My family makes fun of me for liking them so much. But they would too if they just gave them a chance! And I've noticed my mom and sister AE slowing down whenever they are walking past the computer and cute Rocktard is on.

2. CTFxC. Charles and Alli are engaged (their proposal video won the Mashable for Best Video last year and beat A Very Potter Musical) and living in Tallahassee. Alli is a senior at FSU and Charles in a full time Youtuber. They also have two dogs Zoey and Marley. While they are a little heavy on the dog footage, they are still strangely fascinating. I have somewhat of a love/hate relationship with Alli. Sometimes she awesome and sometimes I just want her to shut up. But Charles is awesome. He's the guy every guy wants to be and every girl wants to date. Not speaking for myself of course. Just judging by the comments. Anyyyyway, they are pretty awesome and I am anxiously awaiting the arrival of my CTFxC is for Haters hoodie in the mail. I've already got the shirt. Gotta complete the set.

3. Toby Turner. HIGH-LARIOUS. His Laziest vlogs series never fails to make me crack up. It's just him walking around, talking to his audience (audience? what are you doing in an x-ray machine at the airport?) about his day and upcoming things, and he is just so funny. Possibly the funniest of the three I've chosen. But they are all awesome. And you should dundundundunduna subscribe!

PS I just realized I wrote this post whilst wearing my YouTube shirt. Maybe that's where the inspiration came from....

Glory, glory to ol Georgia!

And to heck with Georgia Tech! Goooo Dawgs! Sic 'em! Woof woof!

Please let us win so we are bowl eligible. Please let us win so we are bowl eligible. Please let us win so we are bowl eligible. Please let us win so we are bowl eligible.

Okay. All done! Goooooooo dawgs!

"Just got paid/ Friday night"

For the first time, I took part in a little Black Friday shopping today. I wasn't one of the crazy people awake at midnight or three a.m. Just around lunchtime I headed over to Target, Old Navy, Borders, and Wal-Mart. I know, Wal-Mart. The armpit of the earth. But supposedly they had some good deals. Only got one thing there. Target was the big winner in my book. Tons of deals, no lines. Unlike Borders and Old navy where the line was weaving through the stores. Luckily my coupon for Borders lasts until Sunday so I will be good. So I got several people checked off my list. Hooray!

I also checked out Amazon and got a super good deal. I'm getting a Flip Cam for Christmas from my mom! Yay! And I saved quite a bit thanks to the special deal. I am so excited! I like making home movies so now that may increase.

"One night and one more time/ Thanks for the memories"

I'll admit, Thanksgiving has never been one of the holidays I get into a frenzy about. I know it's one of the big three (along with Easter and Christmas) but it's not one I get all excited about. Probably because I starve myself all day then eat three bites and am super full and sort of want to die. Hopefully that won't happen this year.

This year I am thankful for my family, my friends, my job and the people and kids at work, and the fact that my sister's family who's been in Seattle for the past 2.5 years are moving back to Atlanta as we speak! So hooray for my whole family being back in the southeast! So I am very thankful for that.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

"You don't understand, you're a legend, man!/ ...You're Harry freakin Potter"

I saw the new Harry Potter movie today. I thought it was pretty good. Especially when you consider that I did not really enjoy the 6th movie and it was by the same director. But I really liked it. I thought it was exciting and it never really lagged in any parts. I really enjoyed Emma Watson in this one considering she sometimes overacts especially in eyebrow expressions. Rupert did a good job as well as Daniel. Yay for the trio still getting the job done in their seventh movie together.

I admit I teared up at the end even though I saw it coming thanks to a particular topic trending on Twitter for the last few days. Still, it was so sad.

Unfortunately I had a very animated (and high schooler filled) audience so I missed some of the dialogue thanks to their excessive laughter (seriously "goblin piss" is not that funny). And some of the teenage girls down the row kept whispering but hey, that's the risk you run.

I'm glad they are breaking it up into two because I hated how they cut SO much stuff out of the fourth film because that book (Goblet of Fire) was my favorite. So I'm glad they are sparing no expense for this one. All I know is I am excited to see the final film. It's gonna be epic.

"Together we will fly tonight/ And leave all the rest behind/ I'll wait for you"

As of 4:45 today, I am on Thanksgiving Break from work. Sweet. But I did realize how much I do enjoy my job because I am genuinely going to miss those kiddos for five days. Not like I won't enjoy the vacay but it will just be weird not to hear "Ms Annie..." 78 times a day. But I did get lots of hugs from the kids, some of the parents, and my coworkers today and it made me a little misty-eyed. But you know me so that shouldn't be that surprising by this point.

It's always been a tradition in my family that we start listening to Christmas music during Thanksgiving dinner. Normally I'm not that excited about it. I mean I expect it but I don't necessarily look forward to it. But this year since I am itching to get into the holiday spirit, I am very much looking forward to it! Especially since Glee released a Christmas album and I have been making myself wait until Thanksgiving to buy it. But my will power is starting to dissipate. All I know is I can't wait to finally listen to it as well as The Charlie Brown Christmas cd. And yeah, yeah I might have a little David Archuleta from last year. What? He has the voice of an angel!

Happy Thanksgiving Break to everyone else lucky enough to be done with work and school for the rest of the week!

PS. Seriously can't believe I've stuck with this for 16 days. Oooooh we're halfway there. Oooooh! Living on a prayer.

"I'm craving for you/ I'm missing you like candy"

Oh. What's this? Just a regular old Reese's Peanut Butter Cup? Nothing special, right?

How about you zoom in on that lower right corner? That's right. 1 pound of peanut butter and chocolately deliciousness.

BAM. It's the size of my freaking palm! I saw it at Target and I just couldn't resist. Don't worry, it was a one time thing but I just had to say I've had it. So when you see it at the store next to the Yard O' Licorice and huge Toblerone bar and you think Who would ever buy that? You will know I did. And I never regretted it.

That's a lie. I did when I read the calories on the back. Tiny servings are key, people!

PS. That's two Mandy Moore songs in the past few days. What's wrong with me?

"Hey, hey, HEY!"

Modern Family is the new Arrested Development. I know, I know. That's a strong statement considering AR is in my top 3 tv shows of all time (along with LOST and Friends). I don't know why I didn't get into Modern Family when it started last year (my guess is it conflicted with another show) but I've seen an episode or two this season and thought it was decently funny. Then it took away all the Emmys from Glee so I knew it had to be good. Then it was on sale at Target for 20 and I had to bite. Well I may have watched the entire first season in a very small time frame (hey, they are only 22 minutes long) and I may or may not be obsessed Hint: I am.

It. Is. So. Funny. I crack up multiple times an episode. And I LOVE how all the little things add up by the end of the episode (something AR had down to a science). It's a toss up between Cam and Manny for my favorite character. Cam might possible have the edge. But I really love the whole ensemble and each actor plays their role really well. My only hang-up is Luke because sometimes he's awful at acting but that's the risk you run with child actors (not Manny of course). Speaking of Luke, did you know in real life that kid has been a member of Mensa since he was four?! I know, who would have thought?

But really, it's GOLDEN. And now I must catch up on this season a la Hulu.

"Callin like a collector/ Sorry I cannot answer... And you're not gonna reach my telephone"

Sometimes I realize I am way too dependent on technology... especially my iPhone or just cell phones in general. I especially realize this when I need to tell one of my nieces something and my first thought is "Oh I'll just text them". Yeah, 8 year olds don't have cell phones. But that doesn't mean I don't have this thought once a week: Oh, I should ask SD if I can borrow her American Girl books when I talk to my class about indians next week. Oh it's a 8:30, she's probably asleep. Well I can just text. Wait, she doesn't have a cell phone. Oh well. I can just email her..... Nope. Can't do that either. Ugh. Why can't she just be fifteen already?!

Just kidding, I don't want her to be fifteen. But I do wish she was easier to get in touch with.

"Interjections .../ They're generally set apart from a sentence/ By an exclamation point/ Or a comma when the feeling's not as strong"

Commas. Oh how you are my nemesis.

I feel like I use WAY too many. Sometimes they are all I see on a page when I am editing. A comma here, a comma there, a comma everywhere.

And awesome MS Word makes it so that when you do a quote, it will autocorrect the comma into a period because it thinks it is the end of a sentence as opposed to something being spoken. So point being, I'm inserting a lot more commas into this thing.

I need to poke around MS Word and figure out how to stop the autocorrect cause it will surely drive me insane.

Book update (I KNOW!): I've physically edited the second half of the book. The pages all marked with sharpie and yellow highlighter. Now I'm going back and making all the changes on the word document. It's taking forever but I did make a lot of mistakes so it's okay. I want this thing to be perfect. So all in all, about 25% done with the editing process. That sort of makes me want to cry. But instead I'll just keep highlighting, deleting, and typing so I bump up to 26% by the end of this Starbucks session.

"It's all that I want and it's all that I need/ At Hogwarts, Hogwarts/ I think I'm going back"

Ummmm so who is freaking excited for part one of the last Harry Potter movies to come out?! Me, me, me, ME!!!!!

Oh how that book series affected so many lives and it is far superior to Twilight. I'll admit the last HP movie was a little lacking but this last one looks pretty epic. My brother JP and I have seen the last few movies together so he, my sister-in-law KP, and I are planning on seeing it over Thanksgiving break. Woo!

Although I gotta say, after watching A Very Potter Musical and Sequel, DanRad just doesn't do it for me anymore. Or Rup. Or Emma. It's all about Darren, Joey, and Bonnie. And it will be really hard to see Darco played by a boy and Snape not wearing eyeliner and not have them break into song every few minutes. I know the majority of you have no idea what I am talking about but man on man, AVPM and AVPS are totally awesome.

"Cause you're everywhere to me/ And when I close my eyes it's you I see"

Woah. Almost forgot to do a post today. I literally just had to crawl out of my warm bed to get up and write this. That's how committed I am. And yeah, I was in bed at 10:09, what about it? You know why? Cause kids are exhausting. And they are even more exhausting as you slowly start to realize that children are everywhere.

Seriously. All day at work. My billion nieces and nephew. But those are obvious ones. It's when you're standing in line at Panera and the little boy with his mom in front of you is smiling at you. Or the little girl in her mom's cart at Target who is closer to eye level staring you down in the checkout line. Or the little kid at Yogli Mogli pitching a fit because he wants to seat at the one spot at a table that is sans-chair. His older siblings just tell him to sit in the spot that does have a chair but noooo the little boy has to sit in that exact spot or his world will come crashing down. So you push the extra chair at your table over to the empty spot to remedy the situation. He's happy. I'm happy. Everyone's happy.

Yes, I've also become quite the problem-solver and this job is erasing the lazy right out of me.... for the most part.

And sometimes I forgot I am not at work and start to correct kids I don't know. Whoops. Like at my sister's halloween neighborhood party where I saw a kid chuck a broom at another kid's face and I yelled out, "HEY! How about you don't do that again, sweetie?" in my you're-about-to-get-it voice. Oopsies.

Okay! Off to bed where I am sure I will either dream about an post-apocalyptic world where I am somehow still in charge of my kids and have to keep them alive or dream there are children in my room and I apparently told the parents they could sleep over.

"I wanna be a billionaire so freaking bad/ Buy all of the things I never had"

So I fully admit I'm a little obsessed with Borders these days. I mean, they send me a coupon every week! And now that the holidays are rapidly approaching, they are popping up even more frequently in my inbox. So I print it out and skip on over to Borders to get a brand new shiny book. The only problem is... uhh... sometimes there isn't a particular book that I want. Isn't part of the fun of bookstores browsing? I also fully admit I spend my time in the Young Adult section so it's just interesting what actually makes you pick up a book.

1. The Title: The Mockingbirds, The Summer I Turned Pretty, One Night that Changes Everything, Twenty Boy Summer. These are all titles that prompted me to pick them up, scan the back, become intrigued and later purchase them. But another factor along with the title is...

2. The Cover. I know, I know. Don't judge a book by it's cover but its hard not to. Eye catching ones obviously live up to their purpose, it makes you want to see what it could be about. This is one that prompted me to pick up it cause of the fun cover:

Cute title, pretty cover, not a great book. It was written either in verse or a really long text message alternating between two girls' points of view. Not awful but not exactly a page-turner either. Now this one....

Simple yet intriguing cover. Granted I feel like this one has a bit more clout with the name John Green and the awards and whatnot. I really loved this one. It was one of those boys where I sort of wanted to sob the entire time I read it but I wasn't really sure why. Firefly Lane and The Guernsey Potato Peel Pie Society have also had this effect on me.

And last but not least...

3. The Author. I went in with the intention of buying another book by Lauren Barnholdt because I liked her style and thought she was funny. Then I found two books I've been wanting on the Buy One, Get One 50% Off table (I think my true issue is that in my head I think of it as buy one/get one free. Must correct that) and then I was perusing the shelves on my way towards the checkout when I a name caught my eye: Risa Green. Notes from the Underbelly is quite possibly the funniest book I've ever read. I was laughing so hard that I was physically weak and could not hold up the book. Hilarious. And there she was in the YA section with a new book: The Secret Society of the Pink Crystal Ball! I barely glanced at the blurb before grabbing it and all but running to the cashier. I'm in the middle of that one, let you know how it goes.

See? I go in with good intentions. A coupon for 33% off any one item but then I see books by authors I like, or with pretty covers, or an interesting title and I'm done for.

"Cause two can keep a secret if one of them is dead"

I’m going to try my hand at book reviews. But I sort of hate book reviews so let’s call these book opinions:

You already know I prefer YA fiction, so let’s start off with the Pretty Little Liars series by Sara Shepard. I once professed my love for a particular ABC Family show, but when I started seeing promos for the new series I scoffed. Seriously? Some girls killed their friend? Aren’t there like fifty teenage horror movies about this? How can this be a series? But then they threw in the song "Secrets" by One Republic and my opinion was swayed from “awful” to “perhaps promising”. Then I watched the pilot and... well... I sorta, kinda liked it. And then I watched every episode that aired after that. Well when the “summer season” ended with a killer cliffhanger, I was really torn. Do I read the books and potentially ruin the series? Or do I wait in agony for however long until the show returns (January!) as well as how many seasons it could possibly last? Obviously I opted for the former.

And lucky for me, good old Borders was capitalizing on the success of the show and offering Buy One, Get One 50% off. So I maybe purchased four at once. Which I realize was a risk in the event I didn’t like the first book, but oh it was worth it (and later, I kicked myself for not buying all eight since I got the last four at full price).

Synopsis thanks to Wikipedia: The series follows the lives of four girls -Aria, Emily, Hanna, and Spencer-whose clique falls apart after the disappearance of their leader, Alison. One year later, they begin receiving various messages from someone using the name "A" who threatens to expose their secrets — including long-hidden ones they thought only Alison knew.

Pros:

-Shepard is amazing at cliffhangers. Even if you thought that particular book was only so-so, the ending (or perhaps lack of) would force you pick up the next one because you just had to know what happens next.

-I thought she did a good job at fleshing out each girl and making her distinct and unique. Sure some of them fell into stereotypical roles but isn’t that expected in high school?

- She also succeeded at making each girl likable. Even though I thought Emily was insufferable throughout the series since she was so wishy-washy at least she usually had good (if not slightly moronic) intentions. But I was Team Aria, Spencer, and Hanna at different points during the series.

Cons:

-I found it hilarious that these girls all chain-smoked in the first four books but she clearly started getting more popular and some parents groups were on her case about it. So evidently the girls apparently all got the patch or some gum cause the frequent mentions disappeared by the fourth or fifth book.

-These girls are all rich. I get it. You don’t have to tell me every designer they are wearing or carrying. She would even tell you who made the coffee table, sofa, even a lamp. Boring.

-Every single outfit a girl wore in the last two books was a “sheath”. Seriously, just say dress!

-It sucked that characters that were HUGE in the first two books (Wren and Mr. Fitts particularly) just disappeared into thin air after the second or third book. I’m guessing she didn’t realize she was going to be able to crank 8 books out of this idea but really, why include them at all? I thought maybe they’d pop up in the last book but nope. She totally Waaaaaaaaaalt-ed them (that’s LOST speak for you noobs).

All in all: B+ for the series. The last book sort of sucked just because the conclusion was something that seemed invented/convenient as opposed to something that actually made sense or had been hinted at all along. However; was it addicting? Yes. Did I stay up til 4 am when I had work the next day to finish a book? Yes. Did I choose to read as opposed to watch TV or YouTube? Yes. And these are great indicators of a good book. And at the very least, watch the show on ABC Family!

"You were all by yourself/ Staring up at a dark grey sky/ ... The moment I saw you cry"

"Sometimes I just get tears in my eyes when people cry in movies." -My seven year old niece MG. Me too, MG, me too. She said this extremely teary-eyed (/apologetic) during Ramona and Beezus. Not going lie--I had only been watching for the last thirty minutes of the movie and I was quite choked up myself.

I'm like MG. If anyone cries in any situation, I get rather choked up. I don't know when I became this way that I tear up during a freaking Johnson & Johnson commercial (They are pledging to their unborn/newborn babies!! It's precious!), but it can get rather embarrassing in public situations like movie theaters.

The movies that without a doubt can make me tear up are:

-The Blind Side. During the scene where Micheal Oher was collecting half-eaten bags of popcorn in the gym, my sister turned to me and said "This is the saddest movie I have ever seen" and we were only like 35 minutes in.

-Remember the Titans. Four words: Left side, strong side. SOB.

-We are Marshall. This wins the award for making me break down in the first ten minutes. Congrats for the additional twenty sobs. And it was Matthew Freaking Mcconaughey! Matthew Fox, sure, but Mcconaughey. I'm such a wuss.

Hmm... I'm seeing a pattern here. Football brings out the tears. Ironic since it's such a manly sport.

But in non-sport related movies:

-Up. Another one where I lost it ten minutes in thanks to the marriage sequence. I also blame this on Michael Giacchino's score. He's also the reason why I cried during more episodes of LOST than I care to admit (75).

- A Walk to Remember and The Notebook. But Nicholas Sparks can make me sob merely through his words so movies derived from his novels shouldn't come as a surprise.

- Titanic. The original tear jerker. Well I'll surely never let go, Jack.

- Marley and Me. Holy crap. You knew the movie wasn't going to (spoiler alert) end well. I mean you saw it coming from a mile away and I still broke down every single time Marley got sick and when the inevitable happened. I also read the book after seeing the movie and cried like a baby too. Really anytime Jennifer Aniston cries. I don't know what it is about her, but I feel for her.

Oh and apparently we can add Ramona and Beezus to the list. Well the last thirty minutes at least.

"I said it's great to be a Georgia Bulldog"

I'm not a fairweathered fan. I'm sticking by my team through thick and thin. Sure we haven't had a great season(s) but we're improving. I'm seeing great things in Murray and AJ Green still has my heart. I have high hopes for the rest for the rest of this season (you know, the last game) and next year. I think Richt is sticking around.

At the end of the day, we put up a good fight against a team that is undefeated and this is arguably our worst season in recent memory. AJ Green was excellent, Chapas made some good catches, always love Durham, and Murray is getting more confidence and better with each game.

Go dawgs!!!! Sic em!

Plus it will eventually be a win when Auburn has to forfeit all their wins thanks to Newton and his daddy. I didn't think I could hate a player more than Tebow but then Newton came into my life. And good to see that he had a few extra hundreds laying around to pay off the refs. Because that one touchdown certainly did not count.

"I'm only fooling myself/ ... But maybe when you smile/ It means you'd stay a while"

You would think being the youngest of five that I would have a tough skin about being teased because I had four siblings to harass me growing up. It's actually quite the opposite-- I can't handle it and hate it when I'm teased/left out of the joke/ whatever. So it's very hard for me to laugh at myself. But I'm getting better at it! Example:

A few weeks ago I was walking into Target behind a woman and couple of teenagers were a ways behind me. I was walking just closely enough behind the woman that the automatic door sensor apparently didn't pick up on my presence (or I'm just that thin. Kidding! I wish). So as I'm walking in, the doors start to close even though hey, I'm walking here. And I think, well they are going to reopen right? As I have this thought, the doors continue to shut and I actually had to pull my head back as not to get my nose pinched in the doors. Awesome. Like I said, there were these teenagers behind me but I had to take a few steps back to activate the sensor. It was rather embarrassing but I just said with a feigned hurt voice "It rejected me." a la Stuart from MadTV. They laughed. I laughed. I grew up a tiny bit. Yeah for improvement!

Almost missed today! 5/5 bloggities. :)

"And I won't forget the men who died/ Who gave that right to me"

Happy Veteran's Day! It seems only appropriate that today I profess my love for the masterpiece that is Band of Brothers. Everyone in my family has ragged on me for not watching this miniseries before. But back when it was actually on tv oh ten years ago, we had to record it on a VHS (old school!) for my brother and I happened to see the one part where a guy is run over by a tank. And I was DONE. Traumatized. Never watching it. Ever.

I don't know what made me come around a few months ago but something did and I watched it and I LOVED it. Not just LOVED it but loved loved loved loved LOVED it. It is SO good. The interviews with the real life older men made me cry every single time. I want meet Dick Winters! But sadly he is no longer accepting fan mail. Sigh. But he is amazing as is every other member of Easy Company and any other man or woman who has donated their services to our country and defended our freedom. Thank you!

Now Hanks and Spielberg teamed up again to document WW2 from the other side of the world for The Pacific. Of course we would cancel our HBO subscription mere weeks before it aired. And just the other day I thought, "Man I wonder when that is going to come out on DVD?" because I'm still so early 2000s where I think it takes almost a year for stuff to pop up on dvd/video (do they even make VHSs anymore? seriously?). But what did I happen to see at Borders when I was shopping the other day (hey neighbor JPT :) )? The Pacific now on dvd? Did I have to resist the urge to buy it right then and there? Yes. Did I risk being late to work to run over to Target to see if it was on sale during the first week of release? Yes, yes I did. Did I miss the first week of release by a day and surely miss out on a sweet deal? Yes, yes I did.

But when I bought my own copy of Band of Brothers a few months ago, I also got Part One of the Pacific as a fun bonus/incentive. Perhaps I shall watch it and judge if I should buy it all. That sounds like a plan. But knowing me, I am going to love it. But I'm okay with that.

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas"

You know how some people hate the Christmas decorations are popping up already? I'm not one of those people. Before Halloween, tacky, but right now, I'm okay with it!

I went shopping at one of those fancy outdoor malls today and they had busted out the decorations. Huge red, shiny ornaments, wreaths everything... love it! My family used to live in Tucker and you knew it was Christmas time when they put the tinsel/light combination decorations in the shape of candles, wreaths, and snowflakes on the telephone poles. And I saw one in a shopping center on my way home from work the other day! Ah, nostalgia.

I think college kind of kills Christmas for you. Because the few weeks before Christmas you are hunched over textbooks, downing coffee, and either taking exam after exam or playing the horrible waiting game until your one. You can't do much with your friends cause you all have exams on different days and obviously you're away from your family. And then even when finals and papers are all done, you are absolutely spent. And then you have to find time in the few days before the actual holiday to shop for your million relatives (if you're like me). Plus these days, you only get like 2 weeks off when I swear my siblings were home for two MONTHS when I was in elementary school. Maybe it was switching from quarters to semesters but still. Of course it would change when I finally get to college. So, yeah, college kind of killed Christmas for me.

And Christmas kind of sucked last year even though I was done with college. Which meant I was unemployed and broke and had no way of buying presents for my family. I felt awful not being able to so I feel like I never really got into the Christmas spirit. But I've got a job this year and I am getting so excited (plus all my family will be here since my sister and her family are moving back to Atlanta after being in Seattle for the last two years! YAY!) but I feel like I need to hold off until at least after Christmas.

And maybe since I already did my lesson plans for December and I know how we are going to have a Jelly Bean Day and decorate christmas cookies and make milk carton gingerbread houses I am already in that state of mind. All I know is, I can't wait to break out the Charlie Brown Christmas cd to listen to while the kids have free time. Woo hoo!

Sort of a random post but I'm a little tired and still wanted to stick to my goal. 3/3!

"We'll be young forever/ You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream"

Oh ye of little faith. You thought I couldn't do it huh? But I'm back, baby!

Like I said, the reason I am not writing as much is because I am literally exhausted at any given point during the day. But I really am enjoying my job. I complain about issues with the kids but I am trying to remember that they are three years old and not little teenagers. Because in between wiping booties, cleaning off boogers, smelling little kid toots ALL day, and telling the kids to stop running/ spitting/ screaming, etc, there are some pretty cute moments that make it worth it.

My job is at a church so the kids have a bible verse to learn every month. And let me tell you, these kids have it down by the second or third day of going over it. Last month's was, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid. Deuteronomy 31:6" and some of my kids use it in everyday life. One of the moms told me that there was a scarily decorated house on Halloween and her husband wanted to take at least their older son trick or treating there. One of my threes said she wanted to go too but the mom told her she would be too scared. And the girl busted out, "But mom! Remember! Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid. Deuteronomy 31:6." Real world application people! And yes, she did go to the house but apparently it was really scary and she and the older brother high tailed it out of there. Still, A for effort.

Oh same little girl, different story: Her one year old sister was fussing one morning and she apparently said, "Don't worry mom, I got this. Bring it down, sis. Bring it down" *along with downward hand motions*. At least I'm not screaming at them to shut up, right?

One day I was trying to teach my kids something, probably opposites or rhyming, I don't remember. But whatever it was, they were doing a good job at understanding it. So sometimes I am delirious and enthusiastic and make a BIG deal of them getting stuff right. So I jokingly told them we should just march right next door and put them in the Pre-K cause they are clearly too smart for my little threes class. One little boy said "No! We don't want to! We want to be in your class!" It was very sweet. They also told me today, most of them still want to be in my class when they are twenty-five years old. Awww.

Another little girl constantly tells me that I'm "still her best friend". Even when she told me the very first time, it was "still", but I'll take it.

And last but not least: the other day, a little girl yelled out from her position on the potty, "Ms Annie!" I was literally reaching for the "wipies" as I asked her "What?" and got a very unexpected response: "I just love you so much" she called back. The girl I work with looked at me and said, "Those are the moments that you'll remember forever." And I will. Especially since I wrote it down in this post. :)

Two bonus potty quotes:

Me: Guys, you've really GOT to stop with the spitting. I can't take it anymore.

K (without missing a beat): And the tooting.

One kid's, ahem poopy, is frequently a shade of a unique color.

Me (muttering to myself as I wipe them): What in the world could you possibly have eaten?

Little kid (very matter of fact): Pickles.

"Please don't be in love with someone else/ Please don't have somebody waiting on you"

The book I finished reading today had a kid in it who talked about blogging a lot. This reminded me of my little blog that has pretty much been all but abandoned these last few months. I'm sorry but honestly I am exhausted 24/7. However I am going to try harder to get back into writing on here. I want to make a big gesture and say a post a day for 30 days but I don't know if I can commit that much. But it's my over-the-top-goal. Plus, I am getting back into editing the book so maybe that will help me want to write on here as well.

So as a baby step back into the blogging world, in the final few hours of this Monday, I present a Music Monday! Woo! Woo! Five songs currently on repeat on my iPod:

1. I Was Wrong -Sleeperstar. I'm a music supervisor's dream. I fall for songs all the time cause they are used on these teen shows and they just fit the moment SO perfectly that I become obsessed and practically trip over my feet running to the computer to download it. This was used on the latest episode of The Vampire Diaries. Say what you will, but that show is awesome. And this scene. Sigh. Ian Somerhalder deserves an Emmy. The single tear. The emotional swell in the music. Sigh. I love him. And, you know, the show too. But really him. He may have finally swayed me to Team Damon. I know, I was shocked too.

2. Enchanted -Taylor Swift. I was extremely excited for Taylor's third album and this is the standout favorite in my approximately 100 listens thus far. But I also love Haunted, Better Than Revenge, and Innocent. Pretty much 9-12 on the album are golden.

3. Dancing On My Own -Robyn. Yeaaaahhh.... it might have been used on Gossip Girl. Whoops. I'm a sucker for the CW apparently.

4. The Ballad of You and I -Melee. This was either a Single of the Week on iTunes, a Starbucks pick, or a Discovery Download on the iPhone. Either way, I got it for free and I am LOVING it. It's a band I might be willing to take a risk on and download the entire album. But I freaking love this song this much that it bodes well for the rest of the songs.

5. I am preemptively saying "Teenage Dream" by Glee feat. Darren Criss on tomorrow's episode. I don't listen to them before the episode airs cause that's like reading the ending of the book first. You gotta save the best for last. But based on last week's preview, it's gonna be totally awesome. Speaking of totally awesome, Darren Criss was the star of A Very Potter Musical and Sequel on Youtube. I already professed my love once but the kid kind of blows Daniel Radcliffe out of the water. I luff him. He is amazing and I may have shrieked when I learned via Twitter that he was going to be on Glee. And while I fought liking Teenage Dream by Katy Perry for a long time, I eventually had to give in. And I am rather obsessed but Darren's version might take the cake. We shall see.

Okay, that wasn't so hard. See you tomorrow.... hopefully! :)

"Street lights/ Big dreams all looking pretty"

Tonight, I went through my box of artwork and assignments (spanning Kindergarten through high school) to find a craft that I am going to use with my kids tomorrow. That's right I'm old school. But as I was sorting through the various worksheets and artwork, I stumbled across dozens of stories I wrote in elementary school. I do not recall writing this many but evidently I did. I don't remember if they were always the assignment or if it was a free time choice but either way I wrote a lot. I totally could have been one of those kids who knew what they wanted to be when they grew up since infancy if I had been paying attention. Drats.

Anyway, I will now share some of these tales with you, dear reader.

We shall start with "Tornado- A True Story" written in the third grade. My most polished of the three pieces and dare I say, the most dramatic. Spelling and grammar as is as much as it pains me to do so....

A storm was starting up outside. The wind howled, thunder booned, and lightning flashed. Four people were home at the Petrella household. Annie and JP were watching Twister, LA was doing her homework, and Mrs. Petrella was walking Molly. Mrs. Petrella noticed a dark cloud over the golf course. She quickly put Molly away and ran into the house and started to watch the weather outside. Then the wind started to blow harder. Then she yelled "Everybody get in the bathroom!" Then once everybody was in the bathroom the electricity went out. Then pounding sounds hit the side of the house. Then hail started. Then after about 5 minutes the tornado stopped. Everybody went outside and they met Mr. Petrella. Trees fell over on electric cords and branches were everywhere. A tree had fallen in the driveway. Then JP called his friend to cut the tree with a chainsaw. John's friend did get rid of the tree blocking the driveway but the two that fell on the electric cord are still there. The Petrella family hopes another tornado will not come. THE END.

As it says in the title, true story. F1 on the golf course that was built next to our old house. Let's just say I have never watched Twister since this happened. Considering it was a gorgeous day and the actual storm brewing coincided with the one in the movie. NEVER AGAIN. Also, I see I suffered from my "can't-think-of-the-obvious-word" even at the tender age of ten since I couldn't some with "power lines" and instead used "electric cords". Potato, po-ta-to.

Now I present to you: The 2 Birds. Written by Annie in the 4th grade.

One day, two birds were flying looking for worms to eat. The two birds were Robin and Jay. When they landed on the ground they both started to peck for worms. Then they each found the same worm and thats how Robin and Jay met.

(next page)

Robin and Jay fell in love Then they decided to get marry. They went to Preacher Pecker. I now pronce you husband and wife.

(next page)

Then one day when they were flying. Robin was talking to Jay and wasn't paying attenion to where she was going. She hit a branch and broke a wing. She fell to the ground, and couldn't get up. Then the old nasty cat came and saw Robin. "Help" cried Robin. Jay flew down and got Robin before the cat could get her.

(next page)

Then they flew off to................................................................................ Holand. THE END.

Clearly I had to refer to a map for the geography at the end. I mean there is love, suspense, quotes, and conjunctions. I was developing some serious skills. It should also be noted I "dedicated" the story to the children's author who had recently visited our school (Nina Laden), my family, and my REAL (underlined twice) friends". Perhaps I was mad at someone at the time?

And last but not least, the story that had me receive the "Young Writer Award" in the second grade: The Magic Pencil.

Once apon a time, in the year 1995. There were three girls named Annie, Krystina, and Abby. They were best friends. They loved to play together. One day they went for a walk in the forest. Then Abby felt something hit her foot. It was a pencil. While Annie and Krystina look at a nest up in a tree. Abby stuck it in her fannie pack. Then they contined thair walk. The next day at school, Abby took the pencil with her. Last night she fon out it was magic. So doing work was not hard. She just said "do my work now". And it did. Then Annie and Krystina fond out. So the next day was the big math test. So Abby use her magic pencil. And their math test was ten pages long. But Abby took her magic pencil out of her desk. And she fineshed in 5 minuetes. And the next day the day they found out their test scores. Annie and Krystina both got a A+. But Abby got a F-. So Abby had to take the test agin. But she took it with a reglur pencil. And she got a A+ too. And she throut away the magic pencil. And Annie, Krystina, and Abby are still friend to this very day. THE END.

I mean, I taught a moral (cheating is wrong and will get you no where in life) and my main character had a "fannie pack". Winner! Not too shabby for second grade.

Seriously, I just got a particular kick out of these three stories and thought I would share.

All material is © 2010 by Annie Petrella. :)

"We don't do it now we'll never make it/ ... Break me out"

Miss me? Sorry, I know I'm awful at updating this here blog. But I'm going to try to get better! Really!

A few weeks ago I made a trip to Borders to get some books that I have given up hope finding at McKay's simply because they are too recent (Hunger Games series) or too obscure (Sisters Red). The cashier asked if I wanted to open a Borders Rewards card. Since I was plunking down quite a bit of money on my purchases, I figured why not? What harm could be done?

Turns out a lot. To my bank account. Did you know they e-mail you a coupon every week? Cause THEY DO! It's usually 33% off any one item which I don't know why they didn't choose 30 or 35 but I'll take it! And you can get special deals (like 50% off Mockingjay the week it was released)! I regret not opening one sooner. At the rate I'm going, I may single handedly save Borders from filing for bankruptcy. I'm really doing a service for the country. You're welcome.

The other day I was standing in line waiting to buy three new books and the cashier asked the lady he was checking out in front of me if she wanted to open a rewards card. She said no and I actually sing-songed (sing-sang?) under my breath, "Big mistake".

And I know.... why buy books? Why not check one out from the library? Or a garage sale or a used bookstore? The way I look at it is if MY book is every published, I want people to be excited and buy it from an actual store. Heck, I would be depressed if I saw it in the bargain bin but at least it would be in a store which is a huge leap beyond my laptop. Plus I wouldn't see a dime of profit from used bookstores or garage sales. Its an industry I want to be a part of some day (hopefully sooner rather than later) so I need to literally pay my dues.

Plus I chalk up the stack of books in my room to research. Maybe I can write it off as a tax deduction....

"Turn a new page, tear the old one out/ And I'll try to see things your way"

Hey, I clocked in just under the "I-Haven't-Written-in-a-Month" deadline. Go me! If I was a student in my class, I'd get a sticker for doing the right thing.

There hasn't been a book update in a while... so shall I? I shall. I'm in the process of editing (again) right now. While my mom read it, she was lovely and highlighted some errors (some on my part, some on Microsoft Words. Especially when it comes to autocorrecting a comma into a period in a quote). I've been reading backwards to catch mistakes as well as polish it. Remember how I was having serious issues coming up with simple words while writing SO? Like that one time I couldn't remember the word monologue and it took me five minutes and I almost had to ask a Starbucks worker? Yeah, since my brain took a nice long book break, I am coming up with better synonyms this time around. And I didn't even have to right click. :)

And to validate the past year of my life, I've been telling pretty much any and everyone about the book. People at work, Starbucks employees who assume I am still in school, friends of friends. People's reactions are always funny to me. Like when I finished writing the rough draft of SO, I got lots of congratulations from my friends and family. And not to sound ungrateful but I didn't think I deserved them. I think it's because I always knew deep down (even during moments of doubt i.e. chapters nine and fourteen) that I could write a book. And I did, plain and simple. It's the getting published that is going to be a major feat for me. Or just getting an agent and the possibility of getting published becoming more realistic.

But it's not impressive to me because that's the way my brain works. I write. I read. I can do those things. That's how I'm wired. That's normal to me so shouldn't everyone be able to do it?

But the more and more I tell people, the more I realize it is sort of uncommon. Only one woman said she had an idea for book so she wasn't as impressed (but she's asked me about the progress every now and then since). But everyone else who is impressed immediately follows it with, "I could never do that. My brain doesn't work that way". And maybe these are people who can solve any math problem, know all the elements on the Periodic Table, can get 102 points on a word in Words with Friends (Darn you AE!), or know all the team names in the NFL. My brain doesn't work that way (especially math and science) so I'm seriously impressed when your brain does. We're all different. And unique. And special. Oh geez, I'm seriously turning in a Preschool Teacher.

It also might be my age that throws people. But really, there is no "You must be THIS tall to write a book" sign posted outside of publishing houses. Why wait?

"Hate is a strong word/ But I really, really, really don't like you"

Four "celebrities" I wish I could lock up in a box and never hear/read anything about them ever again.

4. Speidi. Totally not buying this "divorce" business. Lame attempt at publicity I say. Who walks out of a courtroom with legal documents in plain sight? Fame whores, that's who.

3. Lindsay Lohan. She's in rehab, she's out, she's in rehab, she's dating a girl, they broke up, she has a SCRAM bracelet, it went off, no it didn't, I DON'T CARE. She had what, like, one good movie? And that can mostly be accredited to Tina Fey's script or Rachel McAdams and Amanda Seyfried's acting. Let's see who has the better resume at this point? Hint: Not Lindsay.

2. Miley Cyrus. Seriously. You've 17. Stop acting like a complete skank. Is she even "acting" anymore or is it just for real? I'm think it's the latter. And her parents should be ashamed instead of checking their bank account.

1. Kate Gosselin. Hope all the millions she is making now will go towards her kids' therapy bills later on in life. You know, provided she doesn't blow it all on boob jobs, fake tans, hair extensions, and mani/pedis.

Feel free to create your own list in the comments section!

"I get knocked down but I get up again/ You never gonna keep me down"

Work is going really well! My class is getting heaps of praise from my boss and their parents (like a parent took a picture of the note I wrote to one of my kids and put it on Twitter. Twice. No big deal)! Except yesterday morning when I told them this and gave them all a sticker, they apparently thought that meant they didn't have to behave anymore. Don't worry I got them back on track.

I had a hilarious thing happen yesterday. Honestly it's not even that funny when I tell it verbally so I'm sure all hilarity will be lost in writing. But since I don't record anything in journal-form anymore and I want to remember this it will just have to do:

We were on the playground and apparently a spider's babies hatched everywhere over the weekend because the kids have been finding them nonstop. And they feel the need to tell me and the other teacher every single time by pointing, staring, and yelling. So there was a web on the fence and after the thirtieth time a child told me about it, I tried to distract J and T by asking them to run over and show me how they can climb the little rock wall and wave to me from the top. The two boys took off in a dead sprint and of course they collided at the bottom of the wall in attempts to be the first one there. Little J was face down on the ground not moving (but he has a tendency to do this especially when he is upset and doesn't want the other kids to notice) so I called to him and asked if he was okay. I got no response and little C sitting next me said in a completely flat and serious tone, "He's dead." I know it doesn't sound that funny but I couldn't even move I was trying so hard not to burst into laughter. I could totally see the tone she used being said in a Pixar movie (kind of like this). And yes I did eventually compose myself, get up and check on J and he was completely fine and at the top of the wall in no time.

But I even watched a movie last night where a male character died in a pretty dramatic way and I just thought "He's dead" in C's little voice and I started cracking up. Oh kids, they're so funny and cute.

"Can we pretend that airplanes in night sky are like shooting stars/ I could really use a wish right now"

So I sort of abandoned this blog for a while there. Whoops. But I have a good excuse I swear! I got a job! As of right now it's just for the summer but hey, it's something! About a month ago, I pretty much got to the point where I had NO idea what I was going to try for next due to a lot of rejection and doors shutting. And then my boss from the summer job I had during college friend-ed me on Facebook. I thought Hmmmm... maybe I could ask her if they have any openings left for this summer so I took a chance and asked and she did! Hooray! So I am now the lead teacher of the three year olds class in a Weekday child care program (I essentially got promoted after not working there for three years. Boom). I'll include a few stories about work here and there but the employer and kids' names are staying anonymous. I'm not getting fired!

Today was a good day at work. I thought it was going to start off rough since several of the kids were extra clingy to their parents when being dropped off this morning (must of had a case of the Mondays). Little J especially had a hard time. So about an hour later during circle time, I had two books resting beside me. J excitedly said "I've never read those books before!" Then I said "Great, so they will be brand new and you won't know what's going to happen!" And J exclaimed "I'm so happy". Given his mood earlier in the day I asked him why and he said "Well I've never see these books before" and then he pointed at our Referee's Rules chart (Keep your hands to yourself, obey the first time, and so forth) and our sticker chart where once the kids get eight stickers for sharing, cleaning up, obeying, etc. they get to go to the dun dun dun daaaaa Totally Terrific Treasure Chest and said "And I've never seen these signs before". I don't know why he was so excited about the charts but I'll take it cause they are super cute (thanks mom for decorating them!). And the cherry on top, he said "And I love you" to me. Completely unprompted! Awwww. I wanted to give him twenty stickers but I fought the urge. I don't want to buy the kids' love (even though I clearly don't have to. Zing!).

Towards the end of the day I was reading a book about tadpoles and frogs to two of the kids. The little girl was saying how she had something at her house (maybe a pond or a lake, not sure) and she asked if I wanted to come over and see it. Now, maybe you don't know three year olds but this is one of the highest compliments you can be paid. If they ask you to come over to see them, babysit, or for dinner, you've hit the jackpot. Winner!

I've also gotten a drawing from one of the girls. Her mom also told me when little H was absent two weeks ago (stomach bug. super!) she said she knew that "Miss Annie was going to miss me so much today". And I did, I really did. Plus it worked out that all the girls were out that day so I was left with five boys. That was an interesting dynamic (read: Please God, don't ever let me be the mother of boy quintuplets).

Sometimes you have to come up with little games while you are waiting in line to go somewhere. My class is a big fan of "Simon Says Sitting Down" and "Raise Your Hand If...". I asked them to raise their hand if they were wearing sneakers. All of them were but all save one raised their hand. I asked little T why he didn't raise his hand since he was wearing in fact wearing sneakers. Little T replied, "These aren't sneakers. They're Pumas." Granted he was right but man it starts young doesn't it?

Oh and if you ever want to be entertained, ask a group of three year olds what they did this past weekend. Answers will vary from "I went to the zoo where there were 10 dinosaurs as big as houses!" to "I crashed my mom and dad's cars" (pretty sure both of these were dreams, but I'm not 100% sure).

"One quick look as each of em leaves you ... They take bows and you're batting zero"

This is the second part of my Survivor Recap. First part is here:

Final TC in the TH: Jury time! I love it. Sandra says she's stuck around even though her alliance was decimated. She points out how she tried to get the Heroes to vote out Russell but they never got on board (coughCandicecough). Russell says his game didn't involve luck. Really? So rooting around under random trees in the jungle isn't luck? I see how he could argue it is strategy but please. It was luck. This guy is delusional. Poverty points out she was a threat from day one and she's still here. She calls Russell her pet and says she played a great game. I bet Russell's tongue is bleeding from biting down on it. I wonder if they had to edit out him trying to interrupt. Wouldn't surprise me.

Jury questioning highlights:

-Colby calls Russell out on the no-luck comment. +1 Colby. Poverty points out how she played the two idols for other people at the risk of getting voting out herself. Point to Poverty.

-Coach calls Russell a little man in stature and word. Zing! He says Poverty was a warrior in challenges. He asks no questions. Sit down fool.

-Amanda asks Sandra why her strategy was better. She basically points out how dumb the Heroes were to never vote out Russell when she was willing to jump ship. Pwned.

-Twiggy is voting for Sandra. That's all.

- JT says he made his bed and he's going to lie in it and thinks Russell should do the same. Russell just listens to the "lie" part and keeps yapping about how good of a game he played.

-Danielle says Russ sucks at jury management and no one respects him so he's not going to get any votes. Boom.

-Jerri wants to know why she wasn't taken to the end. Russell says she was too well liked and was going to win. Poverty and Sandra interrupt and say he knew he was going to get Jerri's vote so that's why. And there goes his one potential vote.

- Candice says Russ went too far with the lying. She metaphorically calls Poverty a battered woman. Inapprop.

-Rupert. He's got on his condescending and judgmental voice so this will be good. He says Russell shouldn't be proud of how he played the game. He apologizes to Sandra for not going along with her plan. Poverty finally points out that she had no one to align with but Russell so people need to lay off on the fact she worked with him.

Hmmm... no tears. No snake/rat speech. No charity questions. What an absurd final TC. If I was on Survivor, here is what I would say at Final TC if I was in the final 2/3. Since everyone on that jury is a bitter Betty and Bobby, you should point out that you HAD to vote them out because they were a threat, because they were going to win if they made it to the end. That it doesn't mean you are a better person than them, it just means you played a slightly better strategic game and that's cause their gameplay was forcing you to do that. You gotta stroke their massive egos and say if you could change anything, you wish that feelings wouldn't have gotten hurt or anything taken personally but you understand cause you might feel the same way. Never say "it's just a game" because that sends people into a tizzy.

We see the following votes:

Poverty: Jerri, Danielle, and Coach (where an eagle screech accompanies his statement that "King Arthur's journey has ended". Seriously editors, submit this for your Emmy reel. I'm dying laughing).

Sandra: Candice, Courtney, and Rupert (Sandra was right about how she'll still get his vote).

No amazing trek back the USA by Jeff. Drats. Time to read the votes! We see all of the ones we already saw and then two more for Sandra! She looks so purdy! The first two-time winner: Sandra Diaz-Twine!

I just didn't want Russell to win. I wish Poverty would have since she played a way better strategic and physical game but most juries can't see past their hurt egos. Again, I maintain as I have since last season that Russell is always kept around because everyone knows they can wipe the floor with him at the end. So Russell missed his chance to eliminate his biggest threat numerous times (Sandra) and Sandra's plan repeatedly being foiled by the Heroes ending up rewarding her with the million. Irony!

Reunion show highlights:

- Russell says there is a flaw in the game: America should be able to vote. I believe that show is called "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here". Dear God, please no. Don't let that be Russell's next move.

- Russell has LAMINATED the note from JT and is talking about he made a winner look like the dumbest player ever. JT reaches from behind and tries to throw it in the fire accompanied with a "No!" and flailing by Russell. LEGEND. DARY.

- Jeff says Russell was a delusional, arrogant, mouthy idiot every single day. Gee I wonder who called that last season? Oh yeah ME.

- We get a shot of Sandra's hubby. Thanks for serving our country!

- Russell: Poverty should have won.

Jeff: Again Russell that's a different game. That's called Russell Decides Who Wins Survivor.

I gotta say I don't care for Jeff but he is on fire tonight.

- Russell says he doesn't care about the jury. He keeps saying he only played the game once and doesn't answer Jeff's very direct question. Sandra pipes in (even though her mic is turned off) and says "He doesn't understand".

- Boston Rob points out that Russell plays to make it to the end but he doesn't play to win since he burns too many bridges and insults too many people so he's not gonna get votes.

- "But given the opportunity I will gladly go back and kick your ass all over the island." -Boston Rob. WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN. The only way it would have been better would been if he said "Just as many times as you" when Russell asked how many times he has won. He refuses to shake his hand probably because Russell is the smoke monster.

- JT wins the Dumbest Move ever award.

- Coach kinda humps Colby on national television. Awkward.

- Stephenie is lame and plugs her restaurant on tv when she gets asked her one question. Lame. Jeff rolls his eyes. Awesome.

- "Just one question, not a lot of time .....because you will tell a story," Jeff to Coach. Did Jeff take some awesome pills before this reunion? He is killing it.

- We see Rob and Amber's cute baby, Lucia Rose. Awwwwww. According to Cirie's twitter they are pregs again but I haven't seen that info anywhere else (she also said Colby and Danielle are hooking up).

- Russell wins Sprint Player of the Game probably because he made his four children text vote after vote like a mini sweatshop since honestly fifteen people clap when he wins. And Rupert was his competitor? What about Rob? Poverty? Heck, even Sassy Courtney? America, you disappoint me (but not when it comes to American Idol... Lee FTW!).

- "Russell, damn you" -Danielle. Yup, that sums up this season.

- The Survivor compilation image was the dumbest thing I've ever seen.

I totally called the next season taking place in Nicaragua. Well that or Antarctica. But then they wouldn't have ladies in bikinis and shirtless dudes so can't do that. At least I was right. While I always love the All Star seasons, I'm excited to have some fresh blood and no preformed alliances running the game. Bring it on Burnett!

"All that work and what did it get me?/ Why did I do it?"

Soooo the Survivor finale was almost two weeks ago but I haven't had time to do a three hour recap. If you like the show, you watched and know what happened so I am going to just hit the highlights instead of scene by scene. Plus, even though I've made a very conscious effort to cut these things down in length, I'm still getting complaints (you know who you are) so here's the abbreved version. Enjoy!

This episode is titled "Anything Could Happen". It might as well be labeled as "Anything Could Happen.... Besides Russell Winning". Jeff recaps, you know the drill: Heroes. Villains. Boston Rob. Immunity. Idols. Russell's a douchebag. People make the dumbest moves ever (coughJTcough). Sandra and Poverty are the only two who deserve it at this point. Let's see what happens.

After Rupert's ousting, Russell says Sandra played an idol that was totally worthless. Poverty calls him out as says "You did it too!" Twice. +1 Pov-ster. Russell says that Sandra lied to him about having the HII. Sandra smacks him down saying he never told her about his idols until after he played them. Touche Sandra. But really, it's Russell so logic is pointless with him. He accuses Poverty of lying to him and she calls him a toddler. I think that's being generous. We get the obligatory misleading info where maybe Colby won't be going home but we all know he is. I like the Colpster but really WHAT a disappointment this season. Credits.

Treemail. Clue about the challenge in China with actual china (racist). Russell wants to be in the top 3 with Jerri and Sandra since neither "played the game" and "the jury would almost have to vote for me". I think they would vote for Hitler to win before you.

Challenge: Balancing and stacking dishes with one hand. Shockingly, Sandra is out before Colby for once with nine dishes. Anytime Jeff notes how many there are, you know someone is about to fail. Jerri is out with 14. Then Russell with 16. Who knew stacking dishes could be so suspenseful? Poverty is a challenge beast and wins again. She is really making me start to like her.

Colby says "Hey, I know I'm going, let's just enjoy the day". The we get an awkward interview where there's twenty seconds of silence while he tries not cry and says he isn't giving up and has one last attempt. Colby tries to reason with Russell (already a poor choice) about getting rid of Sandra so he, Jerri, and Russell can all try to beat Poverty and eliminate her the next round (yeah cause you've really dominated challenges this season). Russell says he is considering it and that's just so we don't know who is going home 29 minutes into the episode.

TC in the TH: Colby is out surprising exactly no one. I miss BA Colby. I look forward to seeing you in Schick commercials and a small role in thrillers starring Rachel McAdams.

Talk about needing to get Poverty out. Russell says the jury thinks she's some big strategic player but she's not (false) and Jerri says P was just tucked under his wing the whole time (kettle? Meet pot. Minus the fact this is NOT true).

Treemail where they go on the stupid journey to see all of the "fallen comrades". Boring and I don't have to say anything for ten minutes. Well besides RIP Boston Rob. Sad emoticon.

Challenge: Navigating a maze blindfolded while collecting four necklaces. First one to the immunity necklace, wins. WHAT?! No endurance challenge? Boohockey! It's a glorified version of Marco Polo (which I would excuse if this took place in China but it doesn't so fail). Poverty is banging into stuff. Sandra is following P's voice. Poverty and Russell get their last necklace at the same time and he is shoving her and pushing her all over the place. Classy. Also probably trying to cop a feel. It's a suspenseful ending as Jerri, Poverty, and Russell are all inches away from the immunity necklace. Russell gets up on his tippy toes and manages to reach the necklace. Russell wins but let's face it he wasn't going anywhere since they all know he is the ticket to the million. Jerri is all excited thinking she is guaranteed a spot in the final three. Russ makes Jeff put on the necklace. Douche.

Russ tells Sandra she is in a real good spot. She knows it's because she already won the million and no one will vote for her again. "That's alright, I'll take the 100,000." For real. But then she says Russell doesn't think she will get a single vote "But I don't know about thaaaaaat." I love her. Russell wants Jerri gone cause she is a guaranteed vote on the jury. Yeah, I'm sure people always vote for the person that burned/blindsided them. Has he ever watched this show before?

TC in the TH: Ping ponging between Jerri, Poverty, Jerri, Poverty. Poverty says she has been protecting Russell the entire time. His face is one of anger, frustration, surprise, and disbelief. She tries to dislodge her foot from her mouth and say they've been protecting each other. I immediately worry this is going to be another Danielle-like ousting. Aaaaaand Jerri's out. Let's face it, she needed to go. She could maybe beat the other girls since she has never won and a freaking palm tree could beat Russell at this point. So see ya later Jer!

Day 39! Breakfast feast, natch. Russell interviews that he brought people he could beat this time around since "it didn't work last time". I honestly think this was filmed on a green screen because it sort of looks funny AND I checked out the dates and the finale of Samoa wasn't until a good three months until after HvV finished filming. Don't say I didn't do my research (coughWikipediacough). Maybe he is basing this on the Samoan jury reaction but I don't think he knew the votes during the filming of HvV. He did after all launch RussellGotScrewed.com practically seconds after the Samoa finale premiered. I'm just saying.

At Russell's prompting, Poverty says that if she had ended up on the jury that she would have voted for Sandra. Russell says his game was better than Poverty's. False. Sandra says she is going to burn his hat and goes and throws the fedora in the fire. Awesome. Give her the million now. Such sweet justice for him burning Jaison's socks (twice) on his first season. Sandra says Russell has a big bald spot he doesn't want anyone to know about "but we've been out here 39 days. I've seen it a whole lot of times." +100 Sandra. Give this woman a tv show! You'd almost feel a little sorry for him if he wasn't such an arrogant jerk.

Poverty burns down the shelter and like always I think this is very environmentally unsafe. Sandra says she never hid behind an immunity idol. Touche. (Sidenote: Watching this again after knowing the outcome, there are a LOT of Sandra interviews. Should have been this coming).

Final TC and Reunion in the next post to split it up a little! I'm wordy! Trust me, this is WAAAAAY shorter than it could have been.

"Kiss and tell/ Loose lips sink ships"

Previously on * slight pause * Survivor: Sandra found the HII. Candice and Danielle both made dumb moves and got voted out in a special double elimination episode.

Night 33: Rupert is being a typical d-bag saying how each day his chances of winning this game get better and better. You're doing a great job there, Copernicus: that’s usually how it works when you make it closer and closer to the end of the game. Poverty knows they need to get rid of the remaining Heroes because they have a lot of friends on the jury so she still needs to be nice to Russell.

Whoever edited in the sound effects during Russell’s interview deserves a raise: “When Danielle said ‘We’re closer than you really think, Russell’, the switch went off in my head and I think * light bulb clicking noise * Oh really * cocks head to the side along with a tapping noise * Did she just say that to me?” Classic. Russell sees Poverty on edge and realizes he just eliminated her main alliance and now she has to rely on him. Or her amazing gameplay thus far. Same diff.

Credits, aw man, guess this one isn’t as shocking.

Treemail: A box with a Spring Palm Pre in it. Product placement, yay! They show off the features and Poverty plays right into it to hoping get some free phones in the future and says how cool the phone is. They go to the video app and there are messages from family members! It’s so sweet that when everyone yells, Sandra shushes them so Colby is able to hear the message from his brother. We see messages from Colby’s brother, Poverty’s dad, Russell’s wife, Sandra’s uncle, Jerri’s sister, and Rupert’s wife and know they are going to participate in the next reward challenge. Awkward quote from Rupert: “I can’t wait to get out there and maybe touch my wife.” I think “hug” would have been the less creepy, appropriate, sweet verb to use in this case.

Reward Challenge: Jeff brings in the family members one by one and it’s adorable to see the reunions minus the fact that you know the survivors are rubbing their stank all over their family members. Poverty’s dad seems refreshingly normal. Russell’s wife is rather pretty. Good genes must run in the Donaldson family. Rupert is macking all over his wife but my one thought is how badly his breath must smell. They’ve been married for 12 years so I’m sure the wife has experienced worse (come on, he already looked disheveled on day one). Whew, Sandra loses it when she sees her uncle. She explains how important he is to her and how he was sitting by her mom’s side until her last minute alive. Whew it’s emotional but really I cry when anyone cries so maybe it’s just me.

The survivors are going to throw bucketfuls of water about five feet to their family members who will be trying to catch and dump it into another bucket. First to fill their bucket and raise their flag, wins reward to some place that has blowholes and food and they get to record their memories on the Palm Pre.

Lots of chaos/action this challenge: Colby is yelling at his brother for doing everything wrong. Sandra is yelling in Spanish. Jerri and her sister are doing well. Russell’s wife is spitting in the bucket thinking that tablespoon is really going to help. Rupert's wife is squeezing the water out of her shirt and Jeff announces her crafty game plan. Sometimes I think Jeff shouldn’t be able to announce such things because others follow suit. It’s pretty much between Jerri, Russell, and Rupert. And Jerri wins!

She gets to pick two pairs to go along on the reward and selects Poverty and Sandra. I think if I were in Jerri’s spot I would pick the people who almost won as to not ruffle any feathers. It’s a very diplomatic approach. Well that or I’d tell them to pick a number between 1-100 and the two closest go. Rupert and his wife are making out before saying goodbye and I am sufficiently grossed out. The boys head back to camp.

At the Blowholes, the girls toss some coconuts in these gapping holes and they skyrocket into the air from the huge waves. Everyone ohs and awes like six year olds at a fireworks show. They snap some pictures on their Palm Pre (do I get money for advertising the name in this blog post? Probably not so... iPhone FTW!!!) Poverty says taking pictures was one of the best parts of the reward. Yes because I would want to capture and remember what I look like after not bathing for 30-some days. But they are already going to be on TV so why not?

Sandra talks about her favorite uncle and I immediately worry that we are getting too much backstory on Sandra. I misunderstood and thought she said her mom passed away a week ago and I freak out because they totally told Jenna Morasca and she got to leave but then I am informed it’s been a year and a week. It’s still sad though. It makes me like Sandra more. +10 Sandra.

The girls start talking strategy and Jerri is pooping her pants about Russell most likely being mad for not taking him on the reward. Jerri, there is no way you are making it to the finale three unless you win immunity so moot point. The girls assure her that they have her back (for now). Back at camp, the boys are complaining about Jerri’s “stupid” move. I wouldn’t want to spend the afternoon with those jerks anyway so I don’t blame her for taking the girls. Russell says he has saved Jerri’s ass before but if memory serves me correctly, Poverty saved her by giving her immunity when she was about to go home so maybe Jerri was just returning the favor. Punk. He calls Poverty and Jerri “ungrateful little bitches” showing off his chauvinistic attitude. Notice he always teams up with girls. This is probably because he thinks no one would be dumb enough to vote for a lowly girl over a burly man. He doesn’t know his strategy didn’t work in Samoa and I think he is about to get pwned again. (Sidenote: They should have Samoa Girl Scout cookies be a reward. People go crazy for those in everyday life. When you haven’t eaten for over a month they would go absolutely bonkers. Make it happen, producers!)

Russell, Rupert, and Colby make an agreement to go the final three. I hope the boys aren’t dumb enough to fall for this. -1 to each of the boys. But Rupert FINALLY points out (what I have been saying for the past two seasons... boo yah) that if he can take the best villain to the final three, he is guaranteed the million. True dat. If by "best villain" you mean WORST human ever. +10 to Rupe for finally voicing it.

The girls get back to camp and Rupert is the only one awake so they head to bed. Rupert sees this as the perfect time to saw, chop wood, and break some logs. Brilliant idea. “I have never in my life seen anybody that inconsiderate. I don’t know if it’s incredible cockiness or just complete stupidity. I’m leaning more towards stupidity, quite frankly.” Zing! +10 to Jerri and probably the only time I will ever like you.

Immunity Challenge: Holding your hands up, palms down (another tie in to the Sprint phone?) holding up two poles against an overhead board. If a pole drops you’re out. Last one, wins immunity. Colby is out after 15 seconds. -15 to the Colpster. I wanted to hope that Colby was sucking on purpose so he wasn’t perceived as a physical threat since he dominated the challenges in his original season but I think we can confidently say that is not the case. Sandra follows soon after and then Russell. As Jeff is pointing out that Jerri’s are still dead center, hers inexplicably drops mid-sentence. A compliment from Jeff is bad luck I tell you. Poverty and Rupert have poles resting on the edge of the board, hanging on by a thread. Rupert’s falls and Poverty wins another endurance challenge! Apparently I am really rooting for Poverty at this point because I was sick at the thought of her losing during that challenge. +5 Poverty. And I've started to type out Parvati initially because I'm gaining more and more respect. She really does deserve the million. But she doesn't deserve to miss out on having her silly name be mispronounced.

Russell says since Poverty won immunity, he is going to have to vote for Rupert. Sandra tells Rupert she wants Russell out. Sandra spells it out AGAIN saying everyone wants to take Russell to the end because he is so bad that everyone will vote against him and that’s why he is still here. THANK YOU. Validation. Guess the editors couldn’t keep it out by this point. Because Rupert is an idiot, he runs and tells Russell. -10 Rupert. Russell of course freaks out and confronts Sandra: “Are you with me or against me”. “I’m against you Russell”. Well at least no one can accuse her of lying during the final TC. +10 Sandra. Russell and Sandra say they are both comfortable and not worried about votes. Sandra says “Loose lips sink ships” to Rupert and he doesn’t get that it’s his ship that is about to sink. Poverty asks “Who invited Boston Rob (RIP) back” since Russell ripped off his line. Russell throws out maybe voting for Sandra because this is how he plays the game: guns for anyone who suspects him. Sandra says that today is the last day she can use the idol but she might not use it because she is very confident that she is not going home. Oh Sandra! NO! You’re one of the few who I still want to win.

TC in the TH: Sandra says Rupert tried to stir up some trouble between her and Russell so another villain could go home. Poverty does an awesome imitation of Sandra when she said she’s against Russell. Poverty says again that a Hero cannot be in the final three because they have a lot of friends on the jury. Rupert says you either need to be the top Hero (which he is not) or the top Villain in the final three and own it to win the million. Poverty whips her neck in Russell’s direction at the mention of top villain. Rupert asks Poverty if she’s the top villain and she says “Nope. I’m a hero on the inside”. Time to vote! Sandra: “I’ll write your name again and if I’m up in the final three, you’ll still give me your vote”. I’m guessing Rupert voted for Sandra during the Pearl Islands. Rupert votes for Sandra. Danielle retches as Russell walks up to vote. I would too Danielle, I would too. Time to tally!

Jeff: If anyone has the HII---

Sandra pops up like a Jack in the box, hands on hips: Should I let you finish? EPIC.

She said she had mixed feelings about this TC so she is going to play it because she’d hate to go home with the idol in her bra (cough JAMES cough). Russell and Poverty both confirm they had NO idea she had it. “She’s bad” says Russell. Really? Cause I think she’s AWESOME. I mean sure you risk showing that you were hiding something from the tribe but I think that’s how an HII should be played. Very few should know about it but we know Russell “I can’t keep my one-tooth-too-few mouth shut” Hantz doesn’t abide by that philosophy. Two votes for Sandra. Three for Rupert and the tye-dyed one is gone. He gives a menacing look as his torch is snuffed to Russell. (Someone make a montage of that for all these seasons! There has to be a million of em). But I mean really, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. See ya Rupert! In his exit interview he says “Maybe I wasn’t destined to win Survivor.... But I’m still pretty tough. But I don’t need to win Survivor to know that.” Good so I better not see you on the next All-Star season. I wanted to root for ya but then you failed to oust Russell so I’m all done! Seriously, why we were all obsessed with him during his original season? I don’t remember why.

Let me break this down: Sandra and Poverty are going to stay tight since they are past winners and no one wants to give the money to the same person twice. They NEED Russell because he is despicable and has pissed all pretty much every single person on the jury (seriously, he doesn’t have a crazy Shambo on his side this time) and they know he is their ticket to the million. They know a Hero will beat them and even Jerri could maybe since she has never won before. My guess for final three: Russell, Poverty, and Sandra and I think Poverty will win. But really as long as it's not Russell, I'm be fine. Finale tomorrow!!!! Yeah! Can't wait to see Russell cry AGAIN. It's gonna be epic!